When you have been travelling through leagues and miles of arid, parched and unhydrated land you want to run into a comfort zone...an oasis comes to mind right? The soothing embrace of the cooler climate, flora that soothes the heat-myopic eye, and naturally the irreplaceable sensation of fluid touching your lips are among the sensory experiences we long for and almost expect to have when we run into this landscape...
But what if the castle we have built in the sands of our mind turns out to be a Hades of a place? What if the expectations we have built around it overlap reality by a seriously outrageous margin? In other words, what if the Disneyland we have envisioned, for our fun-loving selves, is overrated shite? The initial feeling of disappointment takes over and then once we get over that emotion, the instinct of flight takes over. To flee is a natural course of action. Perhaps another oasis awaits beyond our known horizons? Not within visibility range but nevertheless trusting gut feeling to push us to go forth blindly and hope we stumble into another verdant utopia is innate...
I want to get away from this mess called home. I thought I was going to have a more relaxed pace here but it seems people will not give me any kind of peace. Or maybe it's just my convoluted mind that is not allowing me to think clearly? Am I just imagining walls closing in on me and characters suffocating me? Or perhaps I really do need to take a break away from break???? Hahahaha does that even make sense? Because I thought this was going to be my vacation, my oasis. But it seems drought has long deprived this place of whatever moisture existed here in the past. I have run into another Gobi or Sahara...a desolate, God-forsaken, scorching, miserable devil's lair. The green pastures, milk and honey and manna for the starving in this biblical haven were mere illusions brewed by a clouded pulp of a brain...
I have to get away once again. This is no place for a manic-depressive, dyslexic and slightly obsessive-compulsive girl. I am raving incoherently once again....my apologies....
2 comments:
Oh yes, no place like home doesn't always hold true. Familiarity does breed contempt at times. I know the feeling. Singapore should change that, let it be your home away from home.
Liisa,
Spend a week in Boracay (with somebody special)the next time you go to the Philippines. It is very relaxing. Let the locals pamper you. You deserve it.
Family is nice, but it isn't always restful.
John
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