Saturday, September 26, 2009

SICK LOVE LOVE SICK SICK LOVE .... love thisssssshhhhhhhh

his vocals contain a sexy/maniacal/eightyish/DepecheModeslashTHECUREish/cum-inducing/ sound to works!!!!!

Friday, September 25, 2009


I just watched one of the most eerie films I have ever encountered being a semi-cinephile myself. Me and my good friend watched it in the Paragon Cinema in Bangkok, my first time to watch in such a venue and I think my first time to view a film in Thailand. I've been here countless times but I guess I've never really found the need to watch movies on the big screen here.

ANTICHRIST is a film basically about a couple who tries to help each other recover mentally and emotionally after the death of their only baby son in a freak accident- he jumped off the window several floors below towards the ground. The story seems ordinary enough except of course for the death of the baby and the carelessness of his parents. But this event "tsunami-es" into a more disturbing experience for the couple and results in the demise of one half of the partnership. This is how the movie becomes mor
e powerful and takes on a meaning - jumping off the silver screen unlike any other film I've seen.

Their child has perished because of their negligence and this halts the wife's daily existence. She is in deep emotional pain and wants to physically sympathize with her son's demise. The husband decides to take on a very drastic form of therapy for his partner's sanity. He exposes his wife to her greatest fear, that of dwelling for a while in a cabin which holds a significance or a lack of it for her. Called Eden, it is a house deep in the woods where she stayed in to write her thesis on gynocide while at the same time spending private moments with her son, Nic.

He finds scrawlings and images on the walls of the attic in the cabin which disturb him. Reading her notes eventually has him concluding that her studies on witchhunts and the mass murder of women throughout history has had a profound effect on her being. This feeling is also convoluted by feelings of self-blame and guilt on her part too. women are inherently evil has become an adage too close to real life than he or she would have wanted.

He gets around to reading the autopsy report on his son's death which he actually hid in an effort to help with her therapy. His son had some abnormality to the structure of his feet. Poring on photographs of his son he found in the toolshed led him to find out that she intentionally made him wear his boots on the wrong feet all the time. Like an act stemming from her sympathizing with the misogynistic acts committed by people throughout history. I know it's preposterous to connect the incorrect tying up of her son's shoelaces to such an event but it may not be far off from being the truth. This realization leaves him reeling with many bad thoughts about her.

The wife catches on to her husband's sudden behavioral change and quickly threatens him physically. The last couple of moments of the movie revolve around the graphic display of blood, gore and severed body parts which leave me and my companion nauseous from the proximity of the screen to our faces. The wife's mental derangement results in her severing her own clitoris and earlier her husband's penis. Her death is brought about by her husband dispassionately squeezing the life out of her in an act of defense and perhaps mercy. Mercy because he does not want her to suffer any more and to inflict pain on herself and others.

The film is very powerful and there are many instances which I can't translate into words which are magnetic and hypnotic. The slow movements of the characters in the PROLOGUE and the almost anthropomorphistic manner of the animals in the film are very striking and are most note-worthy. The EPILOGUE is also a tremendously striking scene with the scores of women clambering up a hill in an arcane act of communal effort or group struggle. Once again symbolism plays an important role in making many of events in the motion picture stand out and UNDERSTOOD.

This film is more or less the kind which make me stretch my comfort zone of mere appreciation of ordinary 1.5 hour flicks. And it's nice because I know that when I do something different I most often learn something from it!

Monday, September 21, 2009


As i plant another obelisk, another milestone in the earth of my existence, I am wrought with puerile reflections on how much gas is left in my tank to traverse and most of all enjoy the journey of life? It seems like a monumental task doesn't it? Trudging through my existence like a drunken sailor is not my idea of a trip nor is extreme comfort with the absence of worry or apprehension but with a cloud of uncertainty hanging over my head an easy enough alternative....

I think the answer lies in taking each day at a time. Like my favorite sport tennis! Taking each point at a time rather than looking at the overall picture of trying to subdue a better opponent or the grand scheme of winning a whole tournament... To enjoy the moments that give us a sense of accomplishment and pleasure no matter how small they may be is easier to accomplish than to say look at today's schedule in the morning and deciding you'd want it to be a good one in the end!

Enjoy the moment, whether I'm having a sumptuous drink in a coffee shop, or laying in some attractive man's arms in my bed. Let the aroma of cocoa hover over my nose, rub my nose against the deliciousness of his male scent? Enjoy the surroundings as I watch the gelatinous thin cloud of smoke from my hot brew obscure the view of scurrying men in suits and women in high heels in their lifestyle of celerity, allow myself the visual pleasure of the ceiling, the darkness, clothes strewn all over the floor, the single light from a certain corner, both our naked skin touching each others' and glowing in accordance to the boudoir's incandescence? Stir my cup with a coffee stick to make sure the mixture of my drink is well-balanced, rove my hands over his chest, neck, cheeks, forehead and look into his eyes to make sure we are in touch after the evil deed has been done? let my lips stain the rim of the cup, the inner and outer parts of his lips, let my tongue slurp up the sensation of sweet, sour, bitter in an ecstatic blending of taste and passion....

I have no idea how my entry turned from a presumably inspirational and rational dialogue into a semi-erotic and spine-tingling scenario but I guess those are the moments that compose my life these days. And they show no signs of abatement or cessation. I am making up for lost ground and making up for it I am indeed! Haha! I am enjoying the company of so many people once again and immersing in the pleasure of extracting what I can off of their stock knowledge and exeperiences and learning a lot in the whole process. I'm becoming more social now, I'm even accepting dinner dates which I never used to do before. Before I was always keen to make sure everything turned out to be financially advantageous for me but surprisingly maturity has gifted me with a more embracing personality. People should enjoy my presence and why not? If I am a gift to them then let our moment in time together be worth-remembering for many of them!

As another year tallies in my life's record, I hope to learn from the fatal errors and tactical mistakes made in the past year. Learn and then forget. Cherish my successes and once in a while let go of myself! Indulge in something without worry of repercussion and consequence but with constant awareness. Stop thinking too much and let the moment unravel in itself. Retain my principles but be flexible for expansion Act like a lady but fuck like a rabbit LOL. Maintain my posture and poise. Know my position in life and never let a monkey onto my back. And of to the death LOL

I will not look ahead into the future but I think I am destined for better things. A man who will make me happy? Men who will make me happy? Sojourns into countries I have never been? More money? A life of great material wealth? A life of extreme mediocrity but great passion and affection? A slower-paced existence? Life on the fast lane? Photography? More friends? Less friends but more confidantes?

Ahh during these moments it's better to just lie on the ground, look at the infinity called the sky and let your mind drift from moment to moment...

Thursday, September 17, 2009

the FELINE in ME....

TO my Yahoo VIP GROUP MEMBERS...I have uploaded new photos of my latest shoot which I adore so much!!!...Please feel free to check the album I have uploaded all the images in...

More to come!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you want to be a VIP member please feel free to EMAIL me at for more details...

I don't entertain memberships that do not email me...
sorry folks just my general rule just to make sure no MR. Shit-for-brains (etc) ever gets to me HAHAHAHAHA

HERE'S a CRACKER for a sample of what's in store!!!!!!


TO EVERYONE who I met in the past two months in my sojourns to Singapore and Shanghai, it was wonderful to have met all of you! Thank God you guys were wonderful and a delight to be with too...I will be traveling again soon and we will be enjoying each others' company again so stay tuned!!!!!

la WInklergirl

NEW PHOTOS!!!!!! πŸ‘„πŸŒˆπŸŒΈπŸ’ƒπŸ½❤️🧜🏽‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️🍭

Thank you for the generosity!!! Lingerie is life!!! Enjoy everyone and always spread the amazing love of the big bad WINKLERGIRL !!!...