Tuesday, July 28, 2009


Long overdue...

But I love the place, I enjoyed the men HAHAHA, I despised the language but I learned lessons....

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


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Friday, July 10, 2009

Yekaterinburg Revelations

Mysteries have always been a fixture in my interest in anything from biology to history to current events. The more questions unanswered, the more boxes opened to reveal more boxes inside, the better. Perhaps this is my obsessive immersion in the strange , the unknown and the questionable, a product of a childhood trauma where my friends never showed me answers to their riddles which came from a silly newsletter published by a giant Chocolate drink brand for their young market. This explanation is becoming too lengthy and is making me digress from my main point. One true thing is I have been a sucker for mysteries for a long time now. And I have had many blog entries anyway to prove that too! There you are.

As I turned on my television for a highly anticipated program, I brace myself for the final say on a near-century old mystery which has tickled my imagination to no end but has plagued the whole world which persistently demands for answers. The House of Romanov ruled Russia for hundreds of years and was the last Imperial dynasty of the country. Czar Nicholas II became the last Emperor of Russia when he and his family were executed by members of the Bolsheviks in 1918. They were thought to have all died within the confines of the cellar in the house were they were kept for more than a year under government arrest.

Mystery then surrounded the whole family and the circumstance of their deaths from then on. The original story was all of them, the family and the members of the Royal Staff, eleven in all, died in that instant. But because of so many details being spewed forth by the higher levels to both local and international entities and units curious about what befell the Romanov family that fateful night in July 1918, the whole story became obscure and muddled. The most popular story to have come out of this and the initial reason that drew me to the Romanov mystique though is the belief that their youngest daughter Anastasia somehow managed to cheat death coming at her in the form of bayonets and bullets. Another side to the story was that she had indeed been shot and wounded but she managed to cling onto dear life and pleaded with a kind soldier, while they were on their way to the burial site, to release her. Anyhow the premise is she managed to live to tell her tale.

That was the point where history mixed with myth and to tell you the truth I would have nothing against any of that because I love the elusive search of Anastasia and the mystical fate of the Romanov siblings! The power of the unknown is just so irresistible for me! But for some perverse reason I guess I am also thankful that National Geographic muscled such great effort to research, examine and exhaustively solve the Russian Royal family mystery finally provided the missing piece of the puzzle. The whole world has been remedied off one thorn and can heave a collective sigh of relief.

The final verdict is....Yes they all died during that night of the execution. Nobody survived and the claims to being the heiress or heir to the Romanov fortune are totally bogus. Nine bodies were found in 1991 in the Koptyaki forest and after a massive scientific and historical blow-by-blow study resulted in the verdict that yes, these were the bodies of the Romanovs with their staff buried with the purpose of concealment from the whole world. The absence of two bodies from the burial site found in 1991 because they would be found more than a decade later a few meters from where the original nine were found. The reason for this slight geographical gap was that way back in the morning after the killings, the executioners attempted to burn the two bodies first but they could not with the weather not cooperating plus the conditions of the soil not helping their cause. They were also fearful of the incoming daylight and the possibility of eyewitnesses to their inexplicable cover-up.

Cutting-edge DNA testing plus a lot of scientific applications as well as mind-boggling research through the historical archives of the Communist party chambers KILLED my Romanov mystery obsession! Their conclusion certainly nailed the coffin on the Russian family's fate. My feeling is ambivalent though in the sense that as much as i want the fire of the enigmatic fate of Russia's last Imperial Family to keep burning, the scientists and the historians who contributed to this historical unraveling of a ninety-year old Pandora's box DO deserve all acknowledgment, papacy(!!!) and command the highest respect! They are champions of this world obsessed with science. The scientific realm is always seeking to dispel myths and mysteries and I am one who recognizes the premise, "Seeing is Believing" greatly.

and the FINAL SOLUTION......

....may be found in this chat transcript.....


Liisa Winklergirl says:
shall we tackle the gay issue concerning transsexual lovers today?

Antony says:
sure why not if ur bored
where do u stand on that issue?

Liisa Winklergirl says:
transsexual lovers are a species all their own
they are NOT gay
BUT THEY definitely are NOT STRAIGHT
if you want to caress, cavort with, lollipop, ride on or even just look at SHEMALE C**K
in the act of intercourse.....dont u agree with me ANTONY?

Antony says:
yea I agree its impossible to hang on to hetrosexuality when ur thinking of having a dick in you or even if the partner of choice has one

Liisa Winklergirl says:
many men who love TSgirls are afraid of being called or thought of as homosexuals...
and i dont know what the stigma is all about there but I love gay MEN too!! Gay men are handsome, cultured and very well-mannered...

and i would f**k a gay man too as long as he doesn't try to look as close to being a woman like me

Antony says:
however i agree that it cannot be gay, as by definition homosexual men are attracted to other men, and manly attributes

Liisa Winklergirl says:
which is why THEy are not gay too right?

Antony says:
the only label which fits even a little is bi

Liisa Winklergirl says:
so men who love tsgirls are....remotely close to Bisexual?

Antony says:
yeah its the only publicy accepted label that can come close
as it really covers all bases

Liisa Winklergirl says:
let us not talk about dispelling the labels will always be dragged into this conversation no matter what we say or not say...LET us PLAy the LABELS GAME

Antony says:
well even if we try to avoid it society and people in general love labels
everyone wants to be pigeonholed into a category
there is a fascination with it
i think for some ts lovers, it's because they want to belong somewhere, they don't wanna be outcast into a non existant box
thats why so many of them ask the whole "am I gay?" question as they want to be categorised
they want to know that they belong to some group
at least thats in my opinion

Liisa Winklergirl says:
so what you are saying is...many of guys who love TS do not want to be left out in the open or in a gray area or not type-casted (as it is the norm of the normal world)? which is why in an unconscious manner they are begging to be labelled too right?

Antony says:
yeah i think it's part of basic human nature
it's not a conscious thing, i think people just want to belong

Liisa Winklergirl says:
ahh belongingness needs....which is part of Maslow's hierarchy anyway...i don't see how it shouldn't apply to sexual preferences and deviations or the lack of these...

Antony says:
this of course is just my opinion, i could be utterly wrong, but it just makes sense to me

Liisa Winklergirl says:
it makes a lot of sense to me....this is a very good perspective and a pretty respectable one anyway...

Antony says:
whenever anything is discovered one of the first things we do is try to categorise it, why would it be any different for sexual behaviours

Liisa Winklergirl says:
very intelligent statement
the question....possibly bisexual cannot describe a man who has chosen to just scr*w TS girls exclusively right?
bisexual is someone who f**ks men and girls...

Antony says:
i don't think it's as simple as that
by definition bisexuals are attracted to either sex
therefore they would easily find a ts girl attractive, as there are characteristics of both sexes
even if the man himself has no attraction to any other male features, he has to concede that ts women have one pretty damning male feature that they obviously like
personally I find the idea of sleeping with a man abhorrent, it does nothing for me at all, as I'm attracted to a female body
but at the same time i cannot deny that i do find c**k to be something which does appeal

Liisa Winklergirl says:
i think what I can derive from your statement is...we, Tsgirls, might as well be the OBJECT of every bisexual's dream....a man and a woman in one, don't you think so? I mean this is just a conclusion to your rather insightful statements above

Antony says:
it would appear that way, but again this is just going from the society accepted definitions
there are some guys whom cannot fall under that label as although they are attracted to ts women, they do not find themselves attracted to genetic females
in some parts of the world they have it right, by accepting TS women as a third sex

Liisa Winklergirl says:
i wonder how we are going to label...bisexual men who adore men and women but have a great disdain for TS girls....normal bisexual men?

Antony says:
nothing is as simple as black and white, we're all really varying shades of grey
some guys will adamantly claim that they're 100% straight, but they just like a lil bit of cock
which is an oxymoron

Liisa Winklergirl says:
haha it is an oxymoron haha i have to second that hahahaha ...even the men who don't want to touch c**k but like seeing TS c**k when theyre screwing them *Hint Hint DOUCHEBAG*

Antony says:
in an ideal world, it would be considered straight to be attracted to ts women, but that all falls apart as soon as they bottom for a girl

Liisa Winklergirl says:
they still like a lil bit of c**k...the sight of it hahahaha

Antony says:
from my experience ts women themselves only want straight men, which is fine as they are basically women, and it makes sense they'd want to be with straight men

Liisa Winklergirl says:
yes the ideal world however crumbles too when you begin to define it with the appendage or the lack of it between your legs hahaha
when you define sexuality that is

Antony says:
but by their very nature of who they are makes that almost impossible as any man that accepts them for who they are, becomes a fag in their world and therefore not suitable
it's a fine line

Liisa Winklergirl says:
somewhere in my career as a Psychology student we were introduced to scales of homosexuality etc
whatever...i have long since forgotten what that was....but i think the scale had one criteria which is incidence of homosexual acts among others..
forgotten it
so how GAY you are is defined by the incidences hahahaha
how screwed up is that?
and by saying screwed up is the Psychological Society
but then again it has always been a gray area science...

Antony says:
i think we're all bisexual by default, but at the end of the day it shouldn't matter as long as your happy


what do you think folks?



transsexual, ts, tsgirl - a person who strongly identifies with the opposite sex (in this case a man who identifies himself as WOMAN) and may seek to live as a member of this sex especially by undergoing surgery and hormone therapy to obtain the necessary physical appearance.

bisexual -
a person possessing the tendency to direct sexual desire toward both sexes

homosexual - a person possessing the
tendency to direct sexual desire toward another of the same sex

c**k - male genitalia

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

commensalism not

Life is all about predation.

The weak get killed, mangled, mutilated, and worse consumed.

The strong dominates, murders, takes advantage and moves in for a meal.

The way I see life has been for me, I have been a good target for many predators. they come in all forms and guises. They could be imbeciles looking for a good conversation. They could be men looking for free sex. They could be desperate people looking for a scapegoat to their narrow lives. They could be loners who do not have a chance at anything social in their own pathetic lives in their abode and limited social existences.

My circumstance too does not help in my cause of avoiding ambush, attack and capture. My situation renders me vulnerable to parasitism and savagery of all genera. I am a product, a commodity for the highest bidder. There is probably no escape for me from the presence of these creatures.

The good thing is in every physical existence there is the concept of evolution.

I can evolve. My character, my strengths, my powers to adapt are malleable and manipulable. I can learn from my experiences and I can change. My individuality does not allow me to pass on my evolutionary qualities to my next of kin. Evolution has to take place in the course of my lifetime, within me. I live my own Darwinian theory of a life.

Of course to evolve and adapt is the way it has to be. Otherwise I will get annihilated, pushed over and swallowed. These lions will be all over me if i do not try to ward off their threats and drown out their roars. They will ravage me if my speed is not enough to outrun them or if my guile lacking to evade detection.

I cannot allow this. This is why my direct actions and thought processes have to be geared towards alertness, adaptability and if needed, combat. This does not necessarily have to be physical combat of course. Minds can be soldiers in a battle that does not exist on a plane of tangible reality. Words can be pawns in a duel in a forlorn place. Actions can be weapons brandished for clashes in a battlefield that transcends physical existence.

It is all over me, all around me, blanketing me. Predators of all sorts...possessing venom, fangs, teeth, claws, digits, brute strength and constrictive capabilities...


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