multiple choices...

Last year I had the most miserable birthday in my whole life...
For many reasons all of which stemmed from the fact that I made the biggest mistake
of establishing a liaison with a super retard...but then those days are gone and look who's desperate now? .....


Today I have decided this will be the happiest day of my life.
Why? How could this happen to one of the most serious thinkers in this business?



Because happiness is a choice. It is an option we can take.
Life is more often than not like a Greek menu. We can hardly read and distinguish eggplant from eggs if we read it in its entirety but if we ask the right questions, we know which recipe works best for our palate and which doesn't! We will always have a hard time choosing which one tastes good and which one doesn't unless we ask the waiters! It works in the same way as in we never know what kind of cards we will be dealt with in life but if we seek guidance from the right people and WE choose to be happy then we will be happy...



Happiness also stems from our own doing. Nobody can influence or cause happiness in our lives! This is FACT! I tell you...no amount of money from somebody, houses from a sponsor or bags from a fan can make us joyous. We create our own happiness! It emanates from our beings and it is up to us to create the atmosphere, dredge the path and conjure our own goals to achieve happiness. This is a lesson I have learned severely throughout the whole year. There are no OTHERS when it comes to finding what makes us happy. OTHER PEOPLE are hell. We are alone in the end and as a result we create the circumstances that make us happy. Of course yes people can contribute to the overall feeling of happiness but to RELY on other people to make us happy? NO! Entrusting our own happiness on other people is like trying to fly through the heavens with gossamer wings. IT IS guaranteed to never work...



Most of all happiness is how we define it to be. It can take any form or guise but it should be internal for it to be lasting. Nothing external will last. EVER. The beauty of life is the borderlines and the boundaries by which we demarcate happiness is in our own hands. We have the compass, the tools to draft the things that make us happy. The only thing we need to acquire is AWARENESS that there are experiences and qualities that we need to acquire and assimilate to experience happiness. We need to be sensitive to the fact too that this is not necessarily an EASY task but you may find it surprising that it is not insurmountable. The things that will open the locks to the box our happiness is locked in may already be around us, except we have just turned a blind eye towards them and ignored them totally...




I choose to be happy today because I have a choice. Friends, people I love and random strangers may make this day memorable for me but I have chosen to be happy and that's it pretty much...

he is Beaauuutiful!!!!!!!!!!!

i want some...........

vanguards or victims...

There is no doubt that there is superiority in numbers. The Red Dragon of the East is indeed wide awake and roaring with the flames of progress and movement. China is a superpower which has thrived on its huge population and vast resources to lead the world economy into the future and grip financial powers-that-be in its hands. Foreign countries and people are scurrying to look for the vast opportunities that the nation has to offer. There is so much money in China that it is unbelievable as a friend of mine said.









Jasmine, a young girl from a province in central China has decided to set forth on a journey to Shaxi, Canton, Southern China to look for work there. She ends up as a thread-cutter in a factory that manufactures jeans which are sold in faraway Western countries. Because home is hundreds of miles away from work she is housed in the factory dormitory along with other Chinese workers like her. The conditions are utterly inhuman. There are 12 girls in one room, food and water is not free and the absence of many basic commodities is common.


The workplace itself is not that different. They start very early in the morning until 7 pm at night. Job orders that require them to work overtime may have them toiling away until 3 in the morning. They are not allowed to rest during work time. They have to sew or cut or zip X amount of jeans per day to meet a certain quota. Many times they are not paid on time. Salary administration is dependent on whether a client who decides to purchase their products in bulk pays on time or not. On more than one occasion their salary day has to be moved to a later date.
The workers are allowed only one holiday every two years. Not only do they not earn anything for the day when they call in absent for a reasonable excuse such as health problems and untoward incidences, their salary is also deducted. It is brutal beyond description.



Her story as well as that of her co-workers, is contained in a series of videos called CHINA BLUE which I have lifted off of somebody's blog (thank you BRYANBOY.COM), I was caught in a maelstrom of emotions which left me exhausted and depressed in the end. There is injustice, disparity, sorrow, hopelessness and a conundrum of negative experiences in the heart of the whole story. Questions plagued me for days after I digested the storyline.. It is more than eye-opening. Like a monkey which has clambered on my back, its has become sort of a burden in more ways than one - the reality that I am living comfortably when I see the situation they are in is disturbing beyond comprehension.



This is what China has become in the microcosmic and macrocosmic view of events taking place in its contemporary existence. It has become such a giant pool of cheap labor and a major player in world economy that it has neglected the individual needs of its people. The individual must be sacrificed for the greater good of the country and the world in ultimatum. Utilitarianism has taken over and what is beneficial for the forward movement of the country must be acquired and put to good use. The people push themselves for this common cause and set aside emotional, social, familial and other individualistic aspects of their lives for the propagation of this movement.




Jasmine seems happy in the end. She gets her salary after three months of working in the factory. She is joyous she can send money back home. It seems to be an unwarranted responsibility carried by many Chinese girls, who work themselves to exhaustion. Despite her youth, she is a tough girl without her knowing it. I would call her a heroine in a heartbeat. Her story is one among millions of Chinese girls who have decided to seek greener pastures in dark meadows. It is a story that is replicated in other Chinese women's lives. I guess in many ways they are trapped but who am I to say that? We all have our own little traps. Theirs is just one where the Establishment has the upper hand because it holds the locks to their traps.




But then again as I surmised in the beginning of this entry, there is power in numbers. Who knows what could happen? When there is a lot of dissatisfaction and unrest there are always minds who voice out their non-conformity. Women or men whose brilliance put them in a special class of people called leaders. They may initiate a Revolution. They may lead their disgraced fellowmen to rise in arms and plunder the Establishment. The balance of power could shift with great swiftness. And then perhaps we might see again history rewritten with a Chinese translation...



(NOTE: you can watch the 15 part-series of Jasmine and her friends' stories by watching the flick on youtube and then looking for the other parts in the side bar to the right. Hope you enjoy and learn a valuable lesson afterwards)

addictive like Ganja!!!

Can't stop playing this on my ipoddddddddddddddd :D

Something cryptic, chilling and sublimely sexual about the vocalist's throaty voice, an innate ethereal-ness to the background voices and the message of the song is powerful!!!

The beat is hypnotic and the guitar music beautifully weaves in and out of the song!!!!



Hello my friend let me tell you a story
It starts with a guy who never had to worry
His life was planned from his first day on this rock
The place he calls home grows a very different crop

He was undercover from a distant milkyway
To learn about us but love came in his way
He said he'd understand but he could not see
That love is the glue in the bigest mystery

Now the deed is done he is on his way
Soon he´ll spread the news in the milkyway
About a little planet where they cannot see
That the love they much cherish is just biochemistry

Oooohhhlympiada RIO!!!

They won the bid for the 2016 Olympic Games besting out Japan in the final round....


They are the first South American city to host the Olympics in the Games' 100 year- history.


It would be a wonderful change for the Olympics to go from the colds in London in 2012 to the heat, bodies and beaches of Rio!!!


Here are some of the most fantastic images I have seen online of RIO!!!


PARABENS BRAZIL!!!!!!!!


































Thank you SO MUCH to Ricardo Carreon's photostream on Flickr and to his blog too!!

Please visit his site: http://ricardosblog.com/blog/photography/

FLORAL day!!!

What a wonderful surprise for me today!!!!


Thank you Ben, my blog fan!!!


It arrived early but what the heck I thank you so much!!


This is so sweet of you!!!


Lots of love, hugs and kisses from the Winklergirl

Outre!!!!

I love the urban-ness, positivity, the rock and roll as well as the beach elements, adore the modernity and the youth of all these collections...

Plus Milan is all about sex sex sex hahaha....(except for Balenciaga in Paris but of course the collection embraced something sexual seeing how embracing to the body the clothes were)

Forget the comments made by these faux-fashion wannabe called actresses and celebs hahaha...

Love the quote in Gucci "bondage is now mainstream, there is no TABOO anymore." hahaha

So you wondering what I been busy with the last few days huh?




Gucci by Frida Giannini




Prada






Versace by Donatella Versace





Balenciaga by Nicolas Ghesquiere

SICK LOVE LOVE SICK SICK LOVE .... love thisssssshhhhhhhh

his vocals contain a sexy/maniacal/eightyish/DepecheModeslashTHECUREish/cum-inducing/ sound to it.....it works!!!!!

Satanical?

I just watched one of the most eerie films I have ever encountered being a semi-cinephile myself. Me and my good friend watched it in the Paragon Cinema in Bangkok, my first time to watch in such a venue and I think my first time to view a film in Thailand. I've been here countless times but I guess I've never really found the need to watch movies on the big screen here.




ANTICHRIST is a film basically about a couple who tries to help each other recover mentally and emotionally after the death of their only baby son in a freak accident- he jumped off the window several floors below towards the ground. The story seems ordinary enough except of course for the death of the baby and the carelessness of his parents. But this event "tsunami-es" into a more disturbing experience for the couple and results in the demise of one half of the partnership. This is how the movie becomes more powerful and takes on a meaning - jumping off the silver screen unlike any other film I've seen.





Their child has perished because of their negligence and this halts the wife's daily existence. She is in deep emotional pain and wants to physically sympathize with her son's demise. The husband decides to take on a very drastic form of therapy for his partner's sanity. He exposes his wife to her greatest fear, that of dwelling for a while in a cabin which holds a significance or a lack of it for her. Called Eden, it is a house deep in the woods where she stayed in to write her thesis on gynocide while at the same time spending private moments with her son, Nic.



He finds scrawlings and images on the walls of the attic in the cabin which disturb him. Reading her notes eventually has him concluding that her studies on witchhunts and the mass murder of women throughout history has had a profound effect on her being. This feeling is also convoluted by feelings of self-blame and guilt on her part too. women are inherently evil has become an adage too close to real life than he or she would have wanted.





He gets around to reading the autopsy report on his son's death which he actually hid in an effort to help with her therapy. His son had some abnormality to the structure of his feet. Poring on photographs of his son he found in the toolshed led him to find out that she intentionally made him wear his boots on the wrong feet all the time. Like an act stemming from her sympathizing with the misogynistic acts committed by people throughout history. I know it's preposterous to connect the incorrect tying up of her son's shoelaces to such an event but it may not be far off from being the truth. This realization leaves him reeling with many bad thoughts about her.


The wife catches on to her husband's sudden behavioral change and quickly threatens him physically. The last couple of moments of the movie revolve around the graphic display of blood, gore and severed body parts which leave me and my companion nauseous from the proximity of the screen to our faces. The wife's mental derangement results in her severing her own clitoris and earlier her husband's penis. Her death is brought about by her husband dispassionately squeezing the life out of her in an act of defense and perhaps mercy. Mercy because he does not want her to suffer any more and to inflict pain on herself and others.



The film is very powerful and there are many instances which I can't translate into words which are magnetic and hypnotic. The slow movements of the characters in the PROLOGUE and the almost anthropomorphistic manner of the animals in the film are very striking and are most note-worthy. The EPILOGUE is also a tremendously striking scene with the scores of women clambering up a hill in an arcane act of communal effort or group struggle. Once again symbolism plays an important role in making many of events in the motion picture stand out and UNDERSTOOD.

This film is more or less the kind which make me stretch my comfort zone of mere appreciation of ordinary 1.5 hour flicks. And it's nice because I know that when I do something different I most often learn something from it!

Milieu

As i plant another obelisk, another milestone in the earth of my existence, I am wrought with puerile reflections on how much gas is left in my tank to traverse and most of all enjoy the journey of life? It seems like a monumental task doesn't it? Trudging through my existence like a drunken sailor is not my idea of a trip nor is extreme comfort with the absence of worry or apprehension but with a cloud of uncertainty hanging over my head an easy enough alternative....



I think the answer lies in taking each day at a time. Like my favorite sport tennis! Taking each point at a time rather than looking at the overall picture of trying to subdue a better opponent or the grand scheme of winning a whole tournament... To enjoy the moments that give us a sense of accomplishment and pleasure no matter how small they may be is easier to accomplish than to say look at today's schedule in the morning and deciding you'd want it to be a good one in the end!



Enjoy the moment, whether I'm having a sumptuous drink in a coffee shop, or laying in some attractive man's arms in my bed. Let the aroma of cocoa hover over my nose, rub my nose against the deliciousness of his male scent? Enjoy the surroundings as I watch the gelatinous thin cloud of smoke from my hot brew obscure the view of scurrying men in suits and women in high heels in their lifestyle of celerity, allow myself the visual pleasure of the ceiling, the darkness, clothes strewn all over the floor, the single light from a certain corner, both our naked skin touching each others' and glowing in accordance to the boudoir's incandescence? Stir my cup with a coffee stick to make sure the mixture of my drink is well-balanced, rove my hands over his chest, neck, cheeks, forehead and look into his eyes to make sure we are in touch after the evil deed has been done? let my lips stain the rim of the cup, the inner and outer parts of his lips, let my tongue slurp up the sensation of sweet, sour, bitter in an ecstatic blending of taste and passion....



I have no idea how my entry turned from a presumably inspirational and rational dialogue into a semi-erotic and spine-tingling scenario but I guess those are the moments that compose my life these days. And they show no signs of abatement or cessation. I am making up for lost ground and making up for it I am indeed! Haha! I am enjoying the company of so many people once again and immersing in the pleasure of extracting what I can off of their stock knowledge and exeperiences and learning a lot in the whole process. I'm becoming more social now, I'm even accepting dinner dates which I never used to do before. Before I was always keen to make sure everything turned out to be financially advantageous for me but surprisingly maturity has gifted me with a more embracing personality. People should enjoy my presence and why not? If I am a gift to them then let our moment in time together be worth-remembering for many of them!



As another year tallies in my life's record, I hope to learn from the fatal errors and tactical mistakes made in the past year. Learn and then forget. Cherish my successes and once in a while let go of myself! Indulge in something without worry of repercussion and consequence but with constant awareness. Stop thinking too much and let the moment unravel in itself. Retain my principles but be flexible for expansion Act like a lady but fuck like a rabbit LOL. Maintain my posture and poise. Know my position in life and never let a monkey onto my back. And of course...shop to the death LOL


I will not look ahead into the future but I think I am destined for better things. A man who will make me happy? Men who will make me happy? Sojourns into countries I have never been? More money? A life of great material wealth? A life of extreme mediocrity but great passion and affection? A slower-paced existence? Life on the fast lane? Photography? More friends? Less friends but more confidantes?


Ahh during these moments it's better to just lie on the ground, look at the infinity called the sky and let your mind drift from moment to moment...

the FELINE in ME....

TO my Yahoo VIP GROUP MEMBERS...I have uploaded new photos of my latest shoot which I adore so much!!!...Please feel free to check the album I have uploaded all the images in...

More to come!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you want to be a VIP member please feel free to EMAIL me at blogwinklergirl@hotmail.com for more details...

I don't entertain memberships that do not email me... sorry folks just my general rule just to make sure no MR. Shit-for-brains (etc) ever gets to me HAHAHAHAHA

HERE'S a CRACKER for a sample of what's in store!!!!!!

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TO EVERYONE who I met in the past two months in my sojourns to Singapore and Shanghai, it was wonderful to have met all of you! Thank God you guys were wonderful and a delight to be with too...I will be traveling again soon and we will be enjoying each others' company again so stay tuned!!!!!

HUGS and KISSES
la WInklergirl

of mundane things...

A most eerie hobby I have acquired probably due to the boredom of a sedate lifestyle is the passive viewing of unknown people's profiles and most especially their photos. Blame it on sheer boredom, blame it on the proliferation of so many networking and dating websites all around the world wide web, or blame it on my nosy ways, it has become a preoccupation that baffles me.







I have no idea how this crept up into my daily routine. I guess it all started out with viewing people I know. I pore over their images and my imagination starts to play its part. I envision their daily routines and lives and the way they party and the way they act crazy just by looking at their albums. I smile at their silly little gestures or I laugh at how they portray themselves to be online. Then at one point or another I probably moved onto viewing people they are with. People I may be familiar with but have never gotten around to become acquaintances with. I have always wanted to shake hands and introduce myself to them but maybe it's the lack of effort, my own shyness at the moment of truth or just wrong timing and place...I don't know..strange isn't it? How could a world be so small and yet so big?



Then I started to look at people on their list whom I do not even know and started looking at their photos too. The same old pattern ensues, the familiar amusement at imagining how they live their lives and what alcohol they love to drink, what clothes they love to wear, the gestures they display in the images. It has all evolved to a point where I am now viewing profiles of people I do not even know and have in no way whatsoever any kind of liaison with. I know sometimes i look at it from a third-person perspective and I find myself asking, why do you enjoy this? Why are you doing this even? There is no ground of familiarity with these people, why do you take a peek into their lives like a voyeur seeking comfort for herself? (Please I am not a perv so don't make this statement out as objectively as it seems to be.)




I think the answer lies in that juxtaposed against my own complex and intricate life, the lives they lead are so much more ordinary and worldly than mine. They live a life that is closer to reality and more down-to-earth. They work hard, they earn, they visit their uncle's or grandson's or godson's or grandma's birthdays and they enjoy the occasion. They laugh, they cajole and cavort in many ways. They drink and get drunk, they eat more than their bodies can contain and they never check their weight. They seem happy and contented. Whereas the life I lead now has become a bit more complicated. I have placed too many boundaries and restrictions on myself. I watch my weight like experts checking seismic valves. I diet like a Spartan. I am constantly oppressed by the reactions of people who look at me and seemingly judge me. It is an extremely claustraphobic lifestyle sometimes. There is no definition to what makes me happy these days, I cannot be contained by simple joys anymore. I am eccentric, I hide, I avoid people and I indulge in pleasures that most people would never dream of.




This strange-ish hobby of peeking into other people's lives on their online personas, this is like looking through a glass wall at Earthlings while I am in a world where the pace is too fast, the people demand too much, the glitter of gold is too bright, anorexia and latex grooved condoms are as common as night and day - a fucked-up Utopia. I know that is an oxymoron but then that's how I want to describe it. My world is called a fucked-up Utopia...




(Note: PS if i have done anything offensive by posting your photos here on this blog please feel free to email me for removal. Thanks guyssss hugsssss )

Orgasmic!!!

only this girl can pull this OFF!!!!

AMAZING!!!


(Note: thank you PEREZHILTON for the video!!!)