Sunday, September 21, 2008

Could I be happy?

Everything I have ever trusted in is starting to take on a facade of gossamer and falsehood. I have never felt this trapped in my life. I want to know who I can trust my most well-kept secrets with but it seems anyone within my life is far from being trustworthy.

Cracks are everywhere in our lives, we tend to look at a tiny crack and think to ourselves this is nothing. It will most likely repair itself after some time. But when we take a look a little bit later we've found that the crack has become a massive gaping hole which is beyond fixing. This is the situation with most people.

My scenario is worlds different. I never saw a misplaced part of the puzzle. I never found anything that was alarming. It just suddenly rocketed on me that the only thing I could ever give my trust to had suddenly become a huge cave of lies and deceit. How come I never saw this coming? What have I done wrong? Did I worship this thing too much which is why the bewilderment at its betrayal is beyond description? What will I do now that it has destroyed anything I have ever believed in?

I am a confused creature more so now that at any other point in my life. I used to be gregarious, dynamic and my zest for adventure was immeasurable. I felt that my productivity and thirst for anything novel could not be bound by any external stimulus. Now I am just a bag of discord and anxiety. There is now a lack of certainty that was not in the least bit evident a few months ago. The nymph that was once nimbling from one escapade to another is now a shivering sprite that wants to just forget about the despair she is now in....

Talk to me...


Anonymous said...

Hi Liisa
Sometimes we want something so much that we can’t see anything else, until it is on top of us and to late. We sometimes see only what we want to see, instead of the whole picture.
In those times maybe it is best for us to concentrate on the day and tasks at hand. It doesn’t help us to dwell on those things that we didn’t see and can’t change. Don’t blame yourself for being optimistic and wanting to believe. Without risk you will get no reward! No one has all of the answers or sees everything.
I hope you are exaggerating when you say, ”Everything I have ever trusted in is starting to take on a facade of gossamer and falsehood”. I know that at times everyone has moments in his or her life that can make it seem like that.
Use the experiences of your life to learn and put that knowledge to good use in your future. Sometimes you find things when you aren’t even looking for them, if you keep an open mind and can recognize them. Recognizing what you want when you find it can sometimes be hard. Sometimes it can be right in front of you and yet you don’t see it.
Maybe being around your friends and talking to them and your parents might be able to help you. I hope you can still trust those that you know care about you. Sometimes just talking about things, with someone who will listen can help.
Keep your spirits up and maybe if you stop looking and go on with the rest of your life. You will be able to recognize the thing you want the next time that you see it. There is always more than one of everything even if they are not exactly the same.

Keep Busy and Have Heart
Best Wishes, Ben :)

Anonymous said...

I like this blog!! It's intelligent,articulate, so funny, and there is an occasional Liisa glamor shot.

I hope you'' feel better and I hope I do too.

You can mark me up as a fan- can one be a fan without cash compensation? Where are the "I love Liisa" T-shirts, then?!


More bikini shots please!

I got over here courtesy of Dick rick's

liisawinklergirl said...

thanks for the support everyone...

the blog is available for everyone of course..its a slate for my thoughts and madness

thanks for being a fan, now i can add you to the pro_liisa team mr kevin as many of them here are....and we can then knock down the anti_liisa fugliness pockmarked team HAHAHAHAHHAHA


Anonymous said...

In a way you are like the giant frog that U posted - you are an extreme example of the homo sapiens species!

Brains, beauty, sexy, AND funny.
There should be a TEMPLE! Or something!

Masarap na!

Truly God did break the mold when U were born - many angels must have sang.


NEW PHOTOS!!!!!! πŸ‘„πŸŒˆπŸŒΈπŸ’ƒπŸ½❤️🧜🏽‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️🍭

Thank you for the generosity!!! Lingerie is life!!! Enjoy everyone and always spread the amazing love of the big bad WINKLERGIRL !!!...